PatrickMead

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Lost Books of the Bible

Are you ready to learn more about the Gospel of Judas? The Book of Jasher? The Gospel of Thomas? Then, my friend, you've come to the wrong place! This short blog is about the other lost books of the Bible; the books we wish God had written, but didn't.

Let's be upfront about this and lay our cards on the table: we are disappointed with the Bible. As grand and wonderful as it is, it seems haphazard and poorly laid out. Don't pick up your keyboards yet. Let me name some of the books it would have been helpful to have.

1. The Book of Worship: Oh how I wish this book hadn't been lost! (for the humor impaired -- I am stepping on the ironic button. No such book was ever written by God, okay? Now, go back to watching Gilligan's Island and hope for a rescue this week) Wouldn't it be wonderful to have a book that said something like "This is the way worship is to be conducted. Herein is a list of the approved songs and the speed at which they are to be sung. Following is a list of the rules on clapping. "Raising hands" is covered in the appendix in the section entitled "So you want to go to hell." How fantastic would it be to have a book spelling out what God approves in worship in mind-numbing, Leviticus-styled detail? We could know that we were absolutely in the will of God because we could go down the list and check everything off as we went. We could even have PowerPoint or MediaShout slides with a magical check appearing as we covered Worship, chapter 6, verses 5-9.
But God didn't give us a Book of Worship for the Christian Age. In fact, there is no detailed description of a worship service in the New Testament. Hmmmmm. Why is that, I wonder?

2. The Book of Fellowship: This is a big one. It is separate from the others because while they spell out behavior that is acceptable to God, this book tells us if we are allowed to fellowship those who don't do everything in the other "lost" books. For example, we see in the Book of Behavior that we are not to smoke. May we fellowship those who do? If not, may we fellowship those who fellowship those who do? How many degrees of separation are required? If I find one of my elders reading an Annie Lamont book or (shudder) a Frank Peretti book, may I still fellowship him? What if he is also in possession of more than two Max Lucado books? If not, may I fellowship those who fellowship him? And so on, ad infinitum. While I agree this book would be huge and rather unwieldy, it would settle quite a few arguments.
But we don't have a book like this. In fact, books such as First Corinthians show us that the laws on fellowship are a WHOLE lot looser than the ones we live by. How'd that happen? Do some of our brethren have this book and only dribble out the info from time to time? This is confusing.

3. The Book of Behavior: We need this one now! This one would cover things like swimming (mixed? Square inch cloth per square inch body area rules? Are rules different in Maine and Florida?), playing the lottery, dress code for Sundays/Wednesdays or if you are serving communion, etc. Wouldn't this be a great book to have? It would be so huge you'd have to be in a church to have one for it would require a dozen or more to lift it. That would come in handy when you found someone breaking the rules you could -- literally -- throw the book at them.
Why didn't we get this book?

What other books do you think we've lost? Play with this awhile and make your suggestions as to books that seem to be lost... or books that some people act like HAVE been written but no one else has seen. Often, when someone confronts me about this or that, they refer to things as being nailed down and forever settled... but they can't nail it down by Scripture. Are they referring to a lost book that they and they alone have access to?

The Bible gives us a narrative of who God is and who we are. The New Testament shows us what saved people acted like and how their leaders led them. It isn't a legal treatise nor is it a set of proof texts -- for if it was a legal text it would be the most poorly written legal text in history. The Bible ISN'T poorly written. It is exactly what we needed: principles, truths, and a narrative that works in every society and every historical era. Will it tell us everything to do, think and believe? No, but it will tell us what the fruits of the Spirit are, what the kingdom of heaven is like, and how to live with each other as we wait for glory.

In the meantime... what other books do we seem to be missing. (tongue planted firmly in cheek)

18 Comments:

  • At 8/02/2006 09:05:00 AM , Blogger Jim MacKenzie said...

    Close to the Book of Fellowship (maybe a companion volume)is the Salvation Issue book. Maybe this is a special index to the fellowship book. Having to make sure I stay within the boudaries of Salvation is a biggie. Takes away a lot of stress to have this book. whew!

    It would also be a great handy reference volume for minister-types, sort of a PDR for Pastors...

     
  • At 8/02/2006 12:49:00 PM , Blogger Steve Baggett said...

    Wow Patrick have you nailed this one on the head!

    as a part of the worship book or maybe even on it's own would the the Women Participation Book. What is she allowed to do on Sunday, Wednesday? Does it change after noon on Sunday? She can't "serve communion", but she can pass it to me if she's sittng next to me? Can she be a "Children's minister"? She can't have a title, but she can do the work? We can't have a "mixed" praise team and if we do they can't be on stage?

    The thing that really gets me about these folks who seem to possess these lost books is how they've seemingly missed the whole ministry of Christ that we have in black and white (and sometimes red). Who did he fellowship with? Sinners, prostitutes, tax collectors and Samaritans for God's sake! Who were his enemies? The ones who thought they had it the most right - the Pharisees. Count me as one who judges less and is thankful for God's love, grace and mercy. "God have mercy on me a sinner".

    sorry for rambling <><

     
  • At 8/02/2006 02:00:00 PM , Blogger David U said...

    Don't just stop at lost books....ask why He couldn't have put them in comic book form? We couldn't have done any worse with them than we have with the books he DID give us.

    How about the book: "Jesus, the Early Years"

    Great post, bro!

    DU

     
  • At 8/02/2006 06:53:00 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Umm...there is a comic book rendition of the Bible. I bought a copy of it for my one sister for her birthday back in May...

     
  • At 8/03/2006 05:33:00 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    The Book of Punishments: What, specifically is the penalty for breaking the commandments in the Book of Behavior. How many swats on the behind does one get for smoking a cigarette? How about smoking in the church restroom? In the foyer?

    The Book of Humor: This book lists the acceptable jokes that can be said from the pulpit, inside the church building, out in the parking lot, or in the home. It would be especially useful if the jokes were all numbered, so that the preacher could just yell out, “148!” and everyone would laugh. Or perhaps we would have a Joke Leader who would say, “Please turn to joke number three-hundred and sixty-seven. That’s three-six-seven.”

    The Book of Silence: A listing of all the topics not discussed in the other books, and which are binding upon us because of this silence. Any topic not listed in the book of silence is assumed to be silent because God really doesn’t care about it.

     
  • At 8/03/2006 05:45:00 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    A couple more (this is FUN!):

    The Book of Fashion: Details exactly what garb every person may wear according to day of the week, area of service within the church, age, body type, and social status. Chapters would include How Long is Too Long (for men’s hair), How Short is Too Short (for women’s skirts—and hair), Appropriate Levels of Makeup for Young Ladies, Piercing Limits, and Prohibition Against Cruelty to Spandex. The Law of Moses wimped out on this one, covering mainly what the priest wore and restricting gender-crossing attire. (In all honesty, I sometimes wish we had just a FEW of the chapters of this book.)

    The Book of Excuses: Acceptable reasons to miss Sunday worship, Sunday night worship, Wednesday worship, Bible Class, or to skip out after the communion (if you have a long car trip ahead of you). Also includes reasons you can’t teach a children’s class, witness to your co-workers, or mow the lawn for the widow down the block.

     
  • At 8/03/2006 07:03:00 AM , Blogger Jimbo said...

    How about the "Book of the Building"? What is acceptable for the buidling use? Can just anyone use the building, and if so, who is resposible for letting them in and cleaning up after them? Should they sign a contract for building use? Should members pay a fee for using the building for personal use?

    There are rules about this somewhere . . . I just can't find them!!!

     
  • At 8/03/2006 03:08:00 PM , Blogger Brian said...

    Certainly there should be a Book of Acceptable Translations, which would explain whether the KJV trumps the NIV, whether the KJV trumps the Message, and which would of course reinforce the reasons why the Message is obviously mentioned alongside smoking in a chapter of the Book of Fellowship.

    Also, I think the Book of Fellowship would need a charts/graphs section, sorting out the order in which combinations of beliefs/behavior should be disfellowshipped. For example, smokers must be disfellowshipped, but not necessarily before drinkers, and certainly not before people with the audacity to worship God using musical instruments.

    Oh, and one more, there would need to be a short book -- called the Letter to 'The' Church -- explaining once for all what should be written on the sign in front of the church in order for those inside to be saved.

    'And you experts in the law, woe to you, because you load people down with burdens they can hardly carry, and you yourselves will not lift one finger to help them.' -JC

     
  • At 8/03/2006 05:01:00 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Dear Brother Mead: I am deeply offended by your frivolous misquoting of the Book of Behavior. If you will re read the text with a sincere heart I am sure you will see the error of your ways. Although I have not read it in many years, the elders in the small church I grew up in made it clear (and they knew the Pretty Good Books inside out)that the Book of Behavior clearly did NOT condemn smoking as you suggest. Indeed, smoking was clearly a sign of being annointed with an innate spiritual maturity. While those of us "milk drinkers" were in Bible class, most of our deacons gathered under the porch to share a smoke and ponder all of the many ways we could share with the unwashed (Methodists, Catholics) with the just thought they were washed (Baptists) and with the never should have allowed them to be washed in the first place (those irritating liberals among us)all of the ways that they needed to live up to the Pretty Good Books of Behavior, Fellowship, Worship, etc. Now drinking... THAT is a different matter. The Pretty Good Books clearly demonstrate that the road to hades has been slickened with a nice bottle of chardonnay.

    The Pretty Good Books... Forgetting to speak where the Bible speaks and speaking where the Bible needs a little help from me. Blessings, IDGAR

     
  • At 8/03/2006 08:27:00 PM , Blogger Franklin Wood said...

    I really wish we would discover the Book of Church Growth (it's pretty disturbing keeping up with all the theories out there!)
    I would also LOVE to read The Book of Ministerial Qualities and Responsibilities, because a lot of others seem to have memorized it and I haven't even seen it!
    Thanks for your creativity and willingness to laugh!!! :)

     
  • At 8/04/2006 05:55:00 AM , Blogger KentF said...

    The Book of Hidden Meaning and the Book of Silence would be interesting. Those that KNOW they fully understand everything God didn't say would be entertaining reads -- and might actually fall under the Book of Worship, but more likely falls under the Book of Puffed Up Egos.

     
  • At 8/04/2006 07:30:00 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    How about the Book of Acceptable Areas of Ministry?
    This way we could all avoid making the terrible mistake of wasting our time doing non-traditional forms of service. We would all be able to conform to one set standard of service work and our churches would never have to beg for volunteers again.
    Silly little "secular" ideas like dog rescue, 4H and all those "anonymous" groups out there are taking way too much of our time away from doing real service work.
    And borrowing from Steve, there should be a special section specifying that all women, especially moms have to serve in the children's ministry.

     
  • At 8/04/2006 08:05:00 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    God left us a narrow entry way into a church that we can never grow out of with solid outer walls we can know and trust but instead of focusing on inviting and welcoming others in, many set to work partitioning off the interior. Be honest, do you like having those walls between you and them or are you ready to enlist their help to knock them down so that when visitors do come in, they have a clear view of what the church really is? Maybe I'm wrong about this but most seem content to notice the walls shouldn't be there but want them left up all the same and few seem to recognize that all those walls are still inside the church. What about those outside the church that are building walls of separation but don't know they aren't in the building? Are we content to let them continue in their delusions? I wish that we would use the books we have instead of wishing for more. What we have is more than enough. Which would we prefer to have, freedom in Christ or the law?

     
  • At 8/04/2006 11:15:00 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    I would love to find the "Book Of How We Can Call Ourselves The Church That Belongs To Christ And Not Be ON-Mission" It must still be in print and in circulation because it is being practiced all over the place. How else can we explain so few following the plain directive of Jesus to "go into all the world and preach the Good News to ever creature"

     
  • At 8/05/2006 04:51:00 PM , Blogger PatrickMead said...

    These are GREAT! I'll leave this post up a couple more days if you have more ideas. After all this, it makes more sense to say that "we walk by faith, not by sight."

     
  • At 8/06/2006 03:41:00 PM , Blogger Keith Brenton said...

    How about "The Book of Authority"? Who has it - in the home, at church, in the world? Who must be obeyed? Whose instructions can we ignore? Preacher? Youth Minister? church Secretary? Elders? Deacons? Committee Heads? Bible Class Teachers? Husbands? Wives? Dads? Moms? (And at what age?)

    It'd be an interesting read.

    Except, of course, for the verse that obsoletes it: "All authority has been given to me in heaven and on earth"....

     
  • At 8/10/2006 12:10:00 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    You forgot the book of Second Opinions which includes such classic quotes as "If I wanted to know your opinion I'd tell it to you", "Do as I say not as I do" and "That's between me and God".

     
  • At 8/22/2006 02:00:00 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    You know there really are books that have been "deleted" from our copies of the Bible, books like Tobit and Enoch. These books are in the eastern Bible, where the church originated. King James didn't like what some of them had to say. Between him and the catholics, several books have been omitted from our versions.

     

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